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Freelancer 2.0 – Making Money Sans The Early Mornings

For those who have been wondering why I disappeared, the reason would be a new blog of course! For the past couple of months, I have been freelancing, getting ready for graduate school, and working on my plays. You can check out my new blog Freelancer 2.0 – Making Money Sans The Early Mornings, it’s a blog guiding freelancers around the world to kickstart their career.

On Water Cooler Promises…

I saw the water,

Brown with anonymous entities floating about.

I remembered that year when they told us

That the water’s contaminated, that only

Those who drank water from X

Are likely to go to the hospital

Hell, who would know from which dam did your

Tap water come from.

 

I saw the water,

I looked at the water cooler

The ones I only saw in a publishing office

In a foreign country when I was eight.

Now they are casually standing in our home

The waterman (as I love to call him)

Comes every Friday, interrupting our early breakfast

That I promise every week not to be part in

For sleeping in purposes

But I still do.

 

The waterman brings us the blue bottles that

Make me lose a life or two as I lug them

To the kitchen

My mom watching, warning me to check if the plastic

Bags covering them are dripping.

How can I check with 2 gallons of water

Held in one hand and a nagging voice behind.

 

The water cooler is the place

Where my brother and I casually meet

He says I never have the time to talk

I say… I’m writing

He says whatever

I say I have to go

 

The water cooler is only three meters away from the sink

Yet, late at night when I wake up

I run to the tap and cup my hand under the waterfall

And drink like a thirsty animal

I remember at that moment what they told us about the water

The germs, the Jews — yes they’re always in the story

But I cannot stop myself.

 

It is satiating.

It fills me like never before

I feel it run down my throat and into my stomach

It seems like a lifetime though it’s not even

A cup’s worth

 

Like our early breakfasts, when I promise myself I won’t wake up,

I promise myself that next time I’d wake up

At 2 or 3 am

That I’d bring myself to pour myself a glass of water

From the water cooler, yet

I cannot. It is just not in me.

On Finals and Vacation

Finals are over and I’m busy working on my new play. However; I must tell you what I observed about finals. Before even saying “Good Morning, my professors tend to switch my place the moment they’re in class. It bugs me off, since I always have to change my “comfy” seat and go to some squeaky chair I don’t like in the front row. Not to mention, that the professors keep on hovering like Dementors around my paper. Sometimes I feel like a cheater, although I wouldn’t cheat even if you cut my head off — goes back to my childhood complexes.  My grades are good, and I don’t see any reason for them to do that. Sometimes I feel like asking them “Why! Why!” It’s unbelievable. It’s either they think I’m a cheater, or that they think students are going to cheat off my paper. In both cases, it’s very disconcerting. Why not move the cheaters/saints?

 

            Another observation about finals happens to be also about cheating. I was sitting in the last row; this guy comes in late and decides to sit in the middle, thus crushing every foot from the right. Later on, he pretends to be cleaning his shoes (with the back of his palm, how hygienic) and then he opens his book and starts going through it page by page. I was flabbergasted not because of his courage, but for the fact it’s a writing exam. How can you cheat on a writing exam?

           

            Students come in without pens. Yes, that’s a fact. I could never leave home without packing at least three or four, a pencil, ruler, and two highlighters. The funny part is, they come in late and then start “whispering” — more like screaming — “Does anyone have a pen?” The professor always watches in silence, with a frown or a smile of sheer amazement. Now, the funny part about this, is the fact that one guy in my English Literature in the 19th Century final, told this girl who was kind enough to give him a pen: “Oh, I don’t like blue. Don’t you have black?” You know what Arabic proverb comes to mind?

 

            Students always seem to ask for extra answer booklets, that makes me a bit anxious. I only use one booklet with like three pages left, yet they go on asking for extra booklets. What are you writing? Did I miss anything? Where we supposed to write a manuscript for the final?

 

            Finals are over. I’m glad they are, for one reason: I can actually sleep without dreaming about sleeping in and missing the exam.

On Finals and Graduation…

It is surreal to think that I only have one semester and a summer session to go. I’m currently lost between the walls of references and photocopies in my room; I can hardly maneuver without tripping. With only 3 exams to go, I will be updating soon. May I just say “Whoohoo!”

On Disappearing and Adventure Games

Yes, Yes, Yes. I know that I’ve disappeared (I’m quite good at that, ain’t I) and most of you were asking me if the documentaries were that depressing, indeed, they are. Quite morbid, if you ask me! So here’s what I did, I started playing The Longest Journey since it was on my “To-Play-List” of 2007, but never got to actually play it. Let me just tell you one thing, I’m a huge fan of adventure games… Indiana Jones, Monkey Island, Grim Fandango, Gabriel’s Knight, you name it. The Longest Journey, however; have exceeded my expectations. I’m not sure what made me love it so much, maybe it’s the very realistic touch of the plot and dialogue, no censoring or fancy schmancy voice-overs. What I really liked about the game, is the characters’ sense of humor. So, back to my game. Tomorrow, I’ll be wrapping up some loose ends of the dying year, and making some preparations for 2008. Yay?

I’m 20! Whoohoo!

I’m 20! Whoohooo! Details of the day tomorrow…

On Eid and Christmas…

First of all, Happy Eid and Merry Christmas everyone. I was thinking about this the other day, why not make a hybrid version of ka’ek and cookies, something like a huge chunk of dates and chocolate; the wrapper would be this lil’ fat sheep posing next to a beautiful Christmas tree. You’d only be given one in the numerous trips. It would be more of a ration kind of thing, a card you’d stamp, and when you go visit another relative, they’d go: shit! Your card is stamped, maybe some other time?

Wouldn’t that be awesome?

That’s just me high on sugar.

Happy Holidays…

What do you think I should watch?

            I’ve decided to wean myself away from Family Guy, Futurama, and endless SCI-FI series and movies. So in an attempt, this coming year, to nourish my knowledge about humanity’s plights and fortunes, I’ve decided to start a documentary marathon. So, I did my homework, and looked up the best documentaries nominated for the Academy Awards, and put them in a weekly schedule. I will be watching/reviewing one each night or so, however; we all know that the men behind the bald guy nominations aren’t as mundane as we are. The Academy committee seems to possess a level of sophistication that many of us will never have, yet that does not make us any less human than they are.

 

            Many of the movies nominated for the Academy Awards, we don’t even know of, and probably wouldn’t enjoy, my example, would be 2004’s Academy Nominated for Best Picture “The Aviator” had the lion’s share of that ceremony and press for that year. However, I didn’t watch or hear of the movie, until they hyper-publicized the plot and wrote odes in favor of the breathtaking performance. After watching it, I was gravely disappointed and wondered what on earth they were thinking. Therefore, there must be a lot of documentaries out there that are good enough for our taste, yet did not make it to the nomination table.

 

The question of the day would be: any documentaries you’d recommend for me to watch?

 

So far, my schedule seems to be:

 

Tonight — Jesus Camp, 2006, Directed by Rachel Grady and Heidi Ewing.

 

December 13thEnron: The Smartest Guys in the Room, 2005, Directed by Alex Gibney

 

Your suggestions are welcomed…

On Mac Guy Vs. PC Guy

 

This is very creative, my dream job is definitely at Apple.

 

++ Idea trapped in a jar by Moey

On Job Interviews and Writing

            Interview secured, CV looks perfect. Everything is good up until the potential employer sees the modest “Awards/Bibliography” part in my CV and asks the ultimate question:

            “You do realize that this job is different from writing a novel or a play?”

            Funny thing is, in three interviews, the three interviewers asked the very same question using the same words. Yes, I’m aware that it is different. The job interview would careen into a discussion of my works, and the themes behind my work, and then a debate of the validity of such writing techniques/themes. Quite charming isn’t it? But I still do need a job, you know?

            As you read, I’m filling out a job application that looks more of the Big Book of Family History, yes, indeed, it is an Embassy. You make a wild guess.

            Of course, if an interview was ever to happen, the bet of the day is when would the interviewer ask about my writing and decide never to give me a call.

            What is it about writing and writers that seems to make employers shy away? Do we come across as rebellious creatures that could never be tamed to sit at an office? Or is it the imagination that worries them? Mmm… I wonder.